Spring 2015 Playlist: “YASS, Bruce Jenner!”

april 2015

…And we’re back!

Following a lazy hiatus, other commitments and a lengthy legal battle with WordPress over my site name (will the real Ross Lohan please stand up!) I promise to never let you down again.

But Rita Ora also said that and she consistently lets everyone down so don’t hold me to it.

A lot of new music has been released in the past few months – some good, a few great, plenty shit (cc: Jason Derulo) – and by now a lot of that music is on the radio. In other words, the majority of it is old news.

SO, instead of re-capping 3 months of stuff, I’m just gonna share my current fave jams suitable for blasting on lush Spring days in the sun.

I’d like to think that these are what were playing in the background when Bruce Jenner was pictured twirling in a stripped maxi dress with a cigarette in the garden because that’s what everyone should be doing to these songs!

Without further ado…

Let’s start with Rihanna‘s American Oxygen. After the iconic strip club anthem Bitch Better Have My Money, listening to this for the first time almost put me to sleep but I’ve came to really love it. Relax your shoulders, let your head bobble and twitch your hands like Lorde as though it’s the new national anthem.

Jamie xx‘s Loud Places is essentially just an ever-so-slightly more upbeat song by The xx but it’s just so dreamy.

There are very few things better in life than new Britney but it’s especially exciting when the new Britney is good Britney. Thankfully, my princess got it right with her cover of Suzanne Vega‘s Tom’s Diner (a.k.a Britney’s Diner.)

The song will appear Giorgio Moroder‘s album in June so the demo that leaked last week has been removed everywhere pretty much – but you can listen here!

What. A. Tune.

I will always remember the first time I listened to Mariah Carey‘s new single Infinity purely because it was so utterly ridiculous that words could not describe what I’d just heard. The lyrics, the breathy singing, THAT note at the end. Phenomenal.

The best thing Justin Bieber has ever done, without a doubt. For one, his voice doesn’t sound as whiny as usual and really the beats are just far too good. God bless Diplo and Skrillex for this one, Where Are Ü Now.

AND THE AWARD FOR BEST SUMMER-SOUNDING POP SONG EVER GOES TO HILARY DUFF! I don’t know what I listened to before Sparks.

Rihanna‘s interludes are always the best. Remember when Birthday Cake was only a minute long? She should have learned from then because James Joint is so good. APPARENTLY, if you close your eyes for the first 30 seconds of this you’ll wake up on the beach in Barbados with Rihanna lighting a joint for you. Not 100% sure, though.

And that takes me to this gem! Queen Madge goes reggae on the Diplo-produced Unapologetic Bitch and obviously it works because she is incapable of doing any wrong. #BuyRebelHeartOniTunes

The Rhythm is a classic feel-good dance song, courtesy of MNEK, that sorta makes you want to join an aerobics class in the 80s just so you can jump about to it in lycra.

Thank me later.

Enjoy the music while you can because the world is not prepared for next Monday. Not only is Britney’s new single premiering on May 4th but Queen of the Universe Paris Hilton is releasing another flawless song to save the world!

Prepare yourselves.

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